The notion of reacting automatically or with a considered response to a situation is one which is often not very clear. Unsurprisingly, fiction writers have given it a great deal of study because they want to depict human behavior in a more realistic way.
Consider the following scenario:
“The tiger crouched, snarling, ready to leap.
Adrenaline pumped furiously into his veins as Jim felt the rush of fear and his muscles tightened immediately for action. He quickly looked around for a way to escape. ‘Will I have to kill this beautiful animal?’ he thought, and sadly raised the rifle to his shoulder.”
STIMULUS: “The tiger crouched, snarling, ready to leap.”
REFLEX RESPONSE: “Adrenaline pumped furiously into his veins as Jim felt the rush of fear and his muscles tightened immediately for action.”
CONSIDERED RESPONSE: He quickly looked around for a way to escape. ‘Will I have to kill this beautiful animal?’ he thought, and sadly raised the rifle to his shoulder.
We all live at the level of reflex response (or reaction) wherein our autonomic systems kick in as a response to our perception and we experience sudden feelings and our bodies prepare for appropriate action, such as to fight, flee, eat, engage in sex, etc, according to our perception.
Too often, though, we let ourselves down with our poorly considered response, that moment of awareness after the reflex when we contemplate our options as to the best course of action. We get caught up in the emotions of our reflexes – fear, anger, jealousy, revenge, etc – and later blame the person or situation that evoked those feelings: “They made me do it!” we cry to justify our reactions.
As we mature and learn to behave in a more constructive way, we learn to pause when negative emotions start to take hold. We learn to shift our attention to consider consequences and what action might produce a better outcome. For instance, we learn not to make important decisions when we are feeling angry; to sleep on the matter and return to it when we are feeling calmer and our mind is clearer.
Studies have shown that many of those who end up in prison have a low threshold for frustration and are less likely to consider the consequences of their behavior. Their reflex responses are acting as we might expect but they haven’t learned to shift attention away from anger and other negative emotions towards better possible ways of handling the situation.
On the other hand, there are those who dutifully ponder the consequences of all feelings and emotions, including the positive ones, and stifle the joy of living. They surrender spontaneity and inhibit feelings out of a fear that all of them may be treacherous.
Of real concern is not learning to handle the emotional surge we experience by not paying more attention to the many negative reflex feelings which alert us to the need for a more considered response. When we feel resentment or anger, envy or jealousy, hatred or revenge, jealousy or fear, instead of being caught up with those feelings and going along for a ride that has an unhappy destination, we would do better to learn to pause and consider what we can do that will make our lives more peaceful, joyful or harmonious.
Our response gives us more control over the direction we take as we respond to life with purpose.




